I’ll say this for online dating, it’s good for my ego. Between Match and Plenty of Fish, I’ve had interest from hundreds of men. Keep in mind I am new meat and reasonably attractive, so it’s not surprising. But still… With that said, all I can say is “oof.” I seem to be saying that a lot. Plenty of Fish is just another site full of nope…. nope…. aw hell no…. seriously?…. that one looks interesting, but no …. likes to hunt for sport or something equally as offensive to my sensibilities…. and so on. Maybe 1 in 20 are men I want to contact. There are a few repeats, but at least they are mostly different from the men on Match.
Paging through pictures of 100’s of men, I have learned some things. Am I less likely to respond if he uses the wrong your/you’re or there/their/they’re? Yes, yes I am. Am I less likely to respond if he doesn’t have a profile picture, or blurry pics, or pictures of him really far away or so close up you can only see his nose? Yes, yes I am. And 1 of my biggest peeves, a man who is wearing a hat in all his pictures, or worse a hat and sunglasses. What are you hiding? A lazy eye? A horn growing out of your head? A hat is not appropriate attire all the time. Either own the hair loss or shave it off, but you’re not fooling anyone.
If you have only one profile picture you are not likely to get any interest from me (anyone can take 1 good picture). Men who actually get me to read their profile, but don’t write an “about me” paragraph or 2 in their own profile don’t usually get any interest from me. If you can’t be bothered to write a few things about yourself, you’re not serious about finding someone or you have nothing to say. There’s a man with a t-shirt on in his profile pic that says “Obey.” No. 69 in your user name, even if it’s your birth year, no. BBW in your user name, no. User name “fetish worshiper,” “bustlover” (I have small boobs, but even if I didn’t…), or “aggressor,” no, no and no. Pictures of just your legs or half your face, no. You’d be surprised at the number of profile pics where all you see is half the man’s face. If your profile picture is sideways or upside down it means you either think it’s cute – it’s not- or you aren’t proficient enough to post a properly oriented pic. A profile picture of just your slammin’ body or of yourself in the gym, no. I don’t want someone so into himself he has little left for me. A profile picture of just a landscape, your house, your pet, your horse, your ridiculously jacked up 4 x 4, noooo.
While I find profile names like the ones mentioned above off-putting, I also appreciate knowing right up front what a man is about. I’ll pass on any man in full hunting regalia with his favorite rifle. I have owned a gun, shot several different handguns, and shot clay skeet with a rifle and was a pretty good shot. But I don’t like hunting in general, and if you’re that into it I’d rather not. I’ll pass on a man with trump gear, or a man with a wad of money displayed prominently in his hand (that’s great, but what do YOU have to offer), or utterly ridiculous clothes, but I appreciate knowing right up front what he’s about. A profile pic should show who you really are, and in that regard honest pictures and profile names are helpful.
After a few days on Plenty of Fish, I’m going to try Zoosk. Might as well. If I’m serious about meeting men with whom I might eventually want a relationship, quantity will hopefully lead to quality.